Badgers

Thought i should post something to get the ball rolling and it should probably be informative..in the words of Karl Pilkington "its a good fact if it gets you thinking..."

Below are some different types of badgers and some simple facts about them...

The fluffy Badger (sometimes also refered to as "The marshmallow of doom")

This badger used to be widely seen in the highlands of wales, but in the great sheep famin of '86 their population suddenly decreased rapidly...nobody knows why, and the welsh folk are unwilling to make a statement. The main use of a fluffy badger was created in victorian times when they were used as a supliment for cheese...this was short lived as the badgers soon learnt of their inevitable fate and began to shave...

Plymouth Badger (Chavious Badgerious Burbericheese)

This badger is often found standing around on street corners or sitting on park benches. This badger can easily be frightened and its main defensive stratagy is to "YOUR MUM" the preditor to death, this is the process of repeating "YOUR MUM" after each sentence said by the opposition..the effect is to piss the other person off so much they just leave. Another tactic also used by the plymouth badger is to cram as many swear words into a sentence as possible to try and confuse the enemy, this rarely works and usually leaves the badger tired and in need of fresh smoke. With a short life span this badger isnt a worry to the public.

Dancing Badger

This badger is often found in fields or in/around bradninch. This badger is a carnivore and often eats a combination of cheese and bacon. When hunting its prey this badger dances widely around the cheese/bacon trying to damage its face area. The dancing badger is widely believed to be the most deadly badger as it has a "self destruct" ability similar to that of the pokemon voltorb. If unable to win a fight the badger will initiate a pancreatic climax before throwing its spleen at the enemy to put it off. The animals pancreas will then rupture and explode leaving only a cloud of deadly spores.

more badgers to be added soon...